Chinese Restaurants Are Not Always What They Seem

Today, I was at the mercy of my mind. I try very hard to prevent this from happening as much as possible, but today i decided to let it roam. I was a sailor of sorts among the ripping waves of my thoughts. I tipped back and forth in the boat I will appropriately name SS. Understanding as waves roaring anger and kindness crashed into one big wave. I watched helplessly as many emotions crashed into, and eventually tipped, my poor vessel. As I struggled not to drown in this mix of emotions, I tried to use the safety ring of writing to pull me out of the raging waters, but it was too late. I was lost to this sea of emotions, and suffered my first writer's block. This was a very saddening thing.
I was overcome with questions for myself. "Why can't you use words to express yourself?" "Are you really going to let a little girl get to you like that?" "What are you thinking?" "Are you losing your touch?" But I spent the evening putting my love for writing and my frustration for writer's block away, and I enjoyed a much needed day with my grandma. We spent time together and conversed in a way deeper than I ever imagined. I walked with her as she watered all of her flowers, and spoke of our Maker and His unbelievable creativity to create something as crazy as flowers. We went shopping and listened to Taylor Swift as we spoke about the way things never turn out the way we plan them to. We ultimately reunited with my grandpa, sister, and cousin to go eat Chinese. As we sat at this unique restaurant and stuffed our faces, I was, once again, hit in the face with all of these emotions. I was mostly struck with frustration, however, for not being able to think of a single topic to elaborate on, out of all of the many thoughts splashing around in my cranium. Just as the lovely waitress woman brought the check to my grandpa, and my cousin rose from his seat to go to the bathroom, I plucked one of the fortune cookies from the table. I opened the plastic wrapping and stared at the cookie for a second. Fortune cookies have always fascinated me. There is no way that a piece of paper inside of a little cookie given to a person at random has any power to tell your fortune. But as I cracked my fortune cookie, I pulled the slip of paper from it and read the words delicately printed on the page.

                           "All the darkness cannot put out a single candle"

At that moment, I realized the meaning to life. Not really, but it would be really cool if that were true! But I did realize that there will always be something dark in your life. There will never be a moment in time, especially in high school, where there is a completely bright room, so to speak. There will always be trouble and doubt. But if you choose to shine through that, look above and beyond, or be a candle, nothing can bring you down. Nothing will be able to put you out. If you just wait, and wait on the bigger picture that is soon to come, you will burn with a light that burns brighter than the sun. If I would have stayed positive, even when it was hard, I could have kept my candle burning bright enough to see through the waves of emotion and keep trekking towards the calm waters. All you have to do is be a candle, and there will be no darkness you can't shine through.

think about it:)