I feel like it’s been too long since I’ve sat here on my floor and typed my feelings out on my laptop. Maybe it’s because I’ve been too busy making life complicated.
Maybe it’s because February is such a busy month. Maybe I’ve been distant because I’ve been trying to figure out who I am. Lately, I’ve run out of answers; I only have questions. I have been trying to figure out what I’m supposed to do about life. What am I supposed to do next? How do I handle this? Is this wrong? Is this right? Questions fill my head, as usual, but it’s a different tidal wave of thought this time. My often gargantuan tsunami of thought processes has changed course. It’s now tons and tons of little, tiny seashells that wash up on the shore to be found. I don’t know how else to deal with all of this besides type, and talk to myself. However, something tells me that if someone overheard me talking to myself, it would be embarrassing. I still continue to argue with myself in hopes of finding the answers I’ve been looking for oh so desperately.
Maybe it’s because February is such a busy month. Maybe I’ve been distant because I’ve been trying to figure out who I am. Lately, I’ve run out of answers; I only have questions. I have been trying to figure out what I’m supposed to do about life. What am I supposed to do next? How do I handle this? Is this wrong? Is this right? Questions fill my head, as usual, but it’s a different tidal wave of thought this time. My often gargantuan tsunami of thought processes has changed course. It’s now tons and tons of little, tiny seashells that wash up on the shore to be found. I don’t know how else to deal with all of this besides type, and talk to myself. However, something tells me that if someone overheard me talking to myself, it would be embarrassing. I still continue to argue with myself in hopes of finding the answers I’ve been looking for oh so desperately.
“…Life’s not a paragraph, and death I think is no parentheses...”
Of all the hundreds of quotes I have gotten my hands on in the past few years, this one is my favorite. Written by E.E Cummings as part of a poem I love dearly, it’s the one poem and literary beauty that never fails to speak to me. It can mean anything depending on the situation you happen to stumble into. Although it’s said that you can write the book of your life, I agree with this quote much more. To me, at this moment in situation, it means that you can’t read ahead. Life is not a short story that you can skip around and skim to see what will happen next, it must be experienced one word at a time. Death, of course, can never be ignored or silenced, much like we often say about the words in parentheses. With that in mind you have to create your life in the time allotted. You can never rewrite life, as you can a paragraph. Many things will happen, good and bad, but you cannot dwell or else you’ll waste time. What could have been may always be in parentheses in your mind, but it must be silenced for you to get anywhere. If it’s meant to be, it will happen. There will be nothing you can do about it. Luck will happen, disaster will strike, but it’s all apart of the game. Life cannot fit onto a page. Not even autobiographies are able to catch everything. There is so much emotion that words cannot even describe. Each experience has 928457 different views, and to say that they can be confined and strapped to a piece of paper is preposterous. Just when I think I have life down to a paragraph, I am shown that there is no way that it’s possible. Life is not a paragraph. It never was, and it never will be. I am so very thankful that it’s not a paragraph, too. Life is truly an adventure, really at the mercy of the way you look at it through your own pair of binoculars. think about it:)
&& click here to read the whole entire poem.
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